#95 - Abandonment of 365 project

This is very sad. Finally, I have decided to abandon my 365 project. Reason being is mainly I have no time, either to snap photo or to post it in blog. I was extremely busy both with work and real life. And I will be still busy later.
Sad.. Because after many considerations, I have decided to take this challege. But unfortunately I cannot see it to the end.

#84 Day 64/365 : Just being me..

I don't know what to call myself or describe 'me'. No ambition? Too low self-esteem?
Maybe all of that.

Today a friend was talking about how she thought that she needed professional help regarding her 'problem' of cannot be spontaneous in public speaking. Whether during presenting projects or during q&a in meetings.
she said she needs notes most of the time.

All these times, I never good at public speaking. Presenting project always a hell. Answering questions during meeting always giving me heart attack. Though I have ideas, I never be able to fully convey the ideas. And sometimes, I can even made people more confused with my explanation.

And yet, never have I thought about seeking professional help.

So, really, back to the question. How to describe myself?

#53 Day 33/365

Was unable to update yesterday and will be unable for more days since I will be on a trip with my sister. Not good for this 365 project isn't it? But so far, I have surpassed my expectation. From the beginning I know I wont be able to update too frequent but until today I have posted more that I can imagine I will.
I have to be even more frequent, isn't it?
If someone asked me, what can I achieve with this 365 thingy? I am not out to impress anyone. I just want  something to do. Plus once a while pouring my heart is good to release some of the stress which I know a lot bottled up in me.
What actually worth of this? My satisfaction.
That's all and that's enough.

#42 Day 22/365

End of the day does not mean end of everything.

Might be a pause.

Might be preparation of new beginning.

What's your end of the day means?

#41 Day 21/365 : Lenses

See the world through the lenses.

Don't be afraid of what you might see.

Be it good, be it bad.

Just embrace it and face the challenge..

#40 Day 20/365 : Yummy/A treat

Still not feeling well although not as high temperature as yesterday. Runny nose and headache plus today, sore throat. (I feel like I kept repeating myself).

So, this was a treat for myself after a long day today.
I do believe we should always reward ourselves once awhile. If nothing that can be call an achievement, to me, it is enough that I survived the day without major breakdown.
Appreciate ourselves more even for littlest thing.

#39 Day 19/365 : Niece/Judging

     My niece digging into Baskin Robbins, ignoring everyone else.

When you getting older, you wish to have the freedom of being yourself, without anyone judging you. Though, sadly, world not working that way.
I tried to be true to myself. But, ignoring others perception, was not something I can do all the time. Is thare anyone who can totally be as such?

#38 Day 18/365 : I need a hug!

Maybe because today is Monday and there goes Monday blues.
Maybe because I am still not feeling well, with stuffy and running nose, fever residue, headache and lethargic.
Maybe because the air-condition in the office was so strong leaving me chilly the whole day.
Maybe because I got so much thing to do but cannot 100% focus.
Maybe because a colleague that keeps asking me something without checking for himself first.
Or maybe just simple reason that I just not in the mood.

For what ever reason or maybes, I just need a hug that can make me feel better. But sadly nobody gives it to me.

#35 Day 15/365 : Windows

When I woke up this morning I asked myself:What are some of the secrets of success in life??

I found the answer right there in my very room. 

The FAN said - be COOL. 

The ROOF said - aim HIGH. 

The WINDOW said -see the WORLD. 

The CLOCK said - every MINUTE is precious. 

The MIRROR said - reflect before you ACT. 

The DOOR said - push hard for your GOAL. 

And dont forget, the CARPET said - KNEEL down & PRAY. 

**found this somewhere but forgot where and by whom

#34 Day 14/365 : My dream

My dream is to one day stand, 

on the most top of the mountain. 

Is the dream too high 

and ambitious for me?

#27 Day 7/365 : Innocence

Sometimes when you think the world is too ugly, too many bad and evil things, then you saw a kid, you see an innocent and you realized there are still hopes for a better world.

I watched a football competition near a local mall. Though I knew none of the participants, it was kind of exciting. Under the blazing sun, it was refreshing watching kids under 12 years old, playing with their best to win the matches. And of course, their family giving full supports outside the field.

It was fun watching the kids, it was fun too standing among the 'supporters'. Fun? Yeah. You could hear all sort of words of encouragement, and definite cursing.

Is the referee blind?

If the referee taking side?

What the hell the goalkeeper doing?

Why the defences stand like a stick?

That should be penalty?

Or more 'violent' words...

I want to kick the referee.

I want to poke that kid.

I want tear the referee's eyes.

!@&!^*#&^!*# (not safe to write)

Like I said, refreshing..

#24 Day 4/365 : Weekending at Comic Fiesta

This was where I spent my weekend. At Comic Fiesta. Full of colors, cosplay, anime-related stuff and some awesome performances. I was having fun. I didn't remember when was the last time I had this kind of fun.

Will post some cosplay later.

#20 Chocolate anyone?

Cold. The weather outside + office's air cond + my not-so-healthy-state contributing to me being almost freezing at my desk.
Guess time for coffee break. Or rather choco break since I already had coffee for breakfast and lunch already.

#19 Calling..

Always a way to call your loves one

Why hesitate

Why wait

Why making excuses not to

May you not be too late

Because you just would never know

#18 Please sit!

Your burden too heavy you? 

Sit before you fell.. 

Slowly unburden it one by one. 

Bit by bit.

Until light enough that you have a choice not to sit.

And ready to take the world again.

#15 A Scene In Tokyo

Have you seen this before? A creative way of moving your kindergardeners from one place to another for the next activity of the day. No hassle. No screaming. And most importantly no lost or stray kid. This was a scene I saw in Tokyo. Not a uncommon scene here. I heard this scene also common in UK. Is it?

I've never been in kindergarden. I was from rural area where kindergarden was a form of privilege and not a must until like 6-7 years ago. I didn't know kindergarden's rhyme until I was in secondary school which was too late. My formal teaching started when I was 7. Nowadays kids start going to school as young as 4 years-old. How different the generations.

#13 Just....

I'm trying to plan what clothes to pack for my trip next week. Ended up I chose 4 out 6 red colour or red base color clothes. Need to change back. *Crying*

#12 Anniversary

May 12, marked 2 years I was left in this world without a mother by my side. 2 years goes by so fast. Pejam celik pejam celik. Feeling like just few days ago I last saw her.


I'm still missing her so very much. Every single thing in life seems to remind me of her. Food, flowers, tv shows, actor/actresses. Is there a time limit for this 'missing'?


My mother might not be the best mother in the world by some other's standard. But she was the best mother for me. If, one day, God gives me the chance to be a mother myself, I wish I could be a good mother like she was. I will give all my loves to my children. I wish I can inspire them in life. I wish I can protect them through the harshness of life and world. I wish I can guide them to the good path of life.


Mom, where ever you are, I'll always going to miss you, remember you and pray for you. may we meet again, someday, in the other world.Wait for me.


Note: The white flower above, I don't know the name. But my mother loved it.

#10 Wild Flower

The flower that not many took notice or bother to take notice of it.
The reason of existence is vague. Is it unintentionally grow there or intentionally?
Some found it facsinating and embrace the beautiful color and sight its provide.
Some found it bothersome and useless and chopping it down without even take a minute to enjoy the beauty of it.
How can you call something useless just simply because you do not know the use of it?

#9 Poor my friend

Why the title as such and butterfly? When I was re-sizing this picture, my conversation with my friend early today popped to my mind. and I think I want to use this picture just because of that.

About my friend, she was telling me how her just-become-ex-boyfriend calling a quit to their relationship. And his reason is he found some one more beautiful than my friend and a bit younger too.

What!!

That guy and my friend were in 3rd year relationship. Whenever I saw them together, I always thought that they going to end up in marriage-department. I guess I was wrong.

The guy seems like a nice guy. So for him to use that excuse to breakup with my friend is a bit unexpected. I asked my friend whether she misunderstood him, then she forward me the message the ex sent her. He really did use that excuse. and he sent text?

Apparently, the new girl working next to his office and they were going out for few weeks already.

Poor my friend. She trusted the guy so much and never in her imagination that he will do this.

I am worry about her. I hope and pray that she wont do anything stupid.

Stay strong girl.